True Blood: An Indefinite Roman Holiday

Warning: Do not read if you haven’t seen True Blood Season 5, Episode 6  “Hopeless”. 

“You were a pompous, self-righteous, arrogant, prick in the fucking Renaissance and you’re still one today” – Russell

What a waste of Christopher Meloni! They endlessly promote him joining the cast, put his name in the opening credits, feature him in every promotion for the season and then he gets staked in the sixth episode? What? Do they not understand that season long guest stars are supposed to last the ENTIRE season? You’d think that’d be self-explanatory.

Casual Friday always has the best happy hour

Alright, I’ve taken a breath. I feel calmer now, so I will continue.  To recap, which I guess is the point of this, after a brief scuttle with the wolves protecting Russell; Authority members showed up to escort Russell back to headquarters.  Bill and Eric were taken back as well and received a hero’s welcome.  Roman came fresh from the back nine and was downright jovial, breaking out some vintage blood and only briefly getting annoyingly preachy. Salome was looking shady, Nora was being freaky, next thing you know, the iStake is malfunctioning and Russell has Roman pinned on the table, stake to his heart.  I repeat. What?

Now, as much as the thought of a Meloni-less season saddens me, I have to admit I love the turn of events. As I may have mentioned in previous posts, it’s been fairly obvious that Salome is Sanguinista and was the one who freed Russell from the concrete. It only became more obvious tonight as she frantically tried to stay in contact with Russell and gave meaningful, coded looks to Nora. So I was pretty sure she would find a way to save Russell (because you don’t waste Dennis O’Hare on one episode), but I certainly did not see the death of Roman coming, at least so soon. In a show that is becoming increasingly ridiculous yet predictable, it was nice to be surprised, but also feel it makes sense within the narrative.

As much as Christopher Meloni’s quiet rage will be missed, Dennis O’Hare is more than suitable consolation. He was brilliant last season and the previews assure us of more of the same. He is truly the best villain True Blood had ever seen and now that he’s back with even more power I have even more hope for the remainder of this season.

This scene could have gone a vey different way.

My favorite part of this episode however was Eric (surprise, surprise). From his added directive to protect Sookie but keep his hands off when glamoring Alcide to his snarky comments to kiss ass Bill, he was on top of his game tonight. Too bad it looks like his sister is a radical whackjob and he’s found himself in the middle of a vampire war. At least it’ll give him plenty of material for more pithy one-liners.

Remember season one? With one basic plot line? Remember how much fun that was? Such a sweet, simpler, more enjoyable time, but now I have about six more storylines I have to pretend matter instead of just annoy me. Excuse me if I seem unenthusiastic, but well I am. Let’s just get this over with.

Jason took Sookie to the fairy club where her God-uncle confirmed that her parents had in fact been killed by a vampire; a mysterious vampire who refused to come out of the shadow or into frame and was drawn to the car by the smell of Sookie’s blood on an old band-aid (I’m gonna go with Russell). So it seems this storyline just served as a PSA to clean out your car, at least of anything containing bodily fluids.

There aren’t even pictures available for these story lines, so enjoy the closing shot of the night.

So Alcide’s memory modification lasted all of seven hours before Sookie un-glamored him and showed him the previous night’s events. Alcide recognized a wolf from Marcus’ pack and sped off to protect a bunch of people who wanted to kill him TWO DAYS AGO. He showed up, ranted about V, and announced he would accept the role of pack master. Well the current pack master had a little problem with that, but Naked Wolf from the pilot backed Alcide and they made some arrangements to have a dual at some later date. I’m not sure what was wrong with right then. I guess they needed some action in a later episode.

Terry and Patrick escaped the fire monster, but their friend was not so lucky. Terry freaked out, as Terry does. He went to Arlene and told he had to leave in order to protect her and the kids. I’d say if anyone is cursed its Arlene. That girl attracts murderers like Jessica freaking Fletcher.

Sam and Luna survived the attack, Emma made it safely to her grandmother’s and the hillbillies playing vigilantes have now moved on to vampires as well. I feel that Marcus’ mother has every right to be in her granddaughter’s life. Sure she ate her dead son’s body, but in the grand scheme of things it’s not so bad. As of now she seems like any normal grandmother wanting to help in a time of need. I’m guessing that might change though, because heaven knows we need more going on this season.

So, just to recap, the vampires are gearing up for a war between themselves over the use of humans as food, the fairies are preparing for a war with the vampires, and humans are declaring war on all supernaturals. Oh, and there’s a curse driven fire monster bearing down on Bon Temps. This could get messy or at the very least, extremely confusing.

A Few Last Burning Questions:

Don’t vampires usually explode as soon as a stake penetrates? Why did Roman look more like Violet Beauregard than bloody goo? Perhaps he’s harder to kill than the Sanguinistas think…

Was I the only one confused about who Nora was babbling about in her cell? Does Her refer to Lilith, or Salome?

Since Sookie un-glamored Alcide, does that mean the order to not touch her has been erased as well or is it still embedded somewhere in there?

Why was the store clerk going to try to kill Andy? And are they just going to stand there and watch him bleed out? That scene really confused me.

Oh hey, remember when Pam was a huge part of this season? Me either, its been too long, get her some more screen time. Thanks

– Devin Mainville

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3 comments

  1. Sue

    Nice nod to Murder She Wrote! Good review/recap. I agree, more Pam!!

  2. Lynn

    Very good review. I totally agree with your comments, especially about too many storylines and confusion about some scenes. But I’m along for the ride!

  3. WTF? Why build up Roman for months before the new season? He only lasted 4 episodes? He lasted longer on HBO as “Chris Keller” on OZ. I am so done with this show. Being Human(U.S. and UK version) truly follows the Vampire, Werewolf, Medium, and Ghost/Demon comcept. MTV series Teen Wolf is not that bad either.

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