Bipartisanship does exist. The president and governor have crossed the aisle and given the American public something we can all agree we need; a mercifully short one hour battle round.
Sometimes its obvious that a coach has a clear favorite within a battle and you can tell he has tipped the scales in their favor with his song choice. And sometimes a coach picks an Adam Lambert song and its clear he hates both his team members. Insecure Daniel and Hurricane Victim Alexis were saddled with the novelty song and it was soon clear that insecurity effects singing a lot more than hurricanes. Carson had been wondering. Daniel and Alexis took the ring looking like the nerdy couple from the class of ’53 and worked the song as hard as you can without the benefit of glitter eye shadow and spandex. Alexis was clearly the better singer, but Daniel is so sweet I kind of want him to win anyway. And apparently Cee Lo agrees. What’s the name of this show again…? Winner: Daniel.
Brandon Mahone vs. Nicole Nelson “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell
Little Brandon looked more like Nicole’s son than her duet partner, but there is no question that they were both well suited to the classic song. Brandon was feeling insecure, because you know, Nicole is amazing. Come battle time he had conquered his nerves, but Nicole was still crazy amazing. What Brandon did have, was personality and he had it in spades. And if Cee Lo taught us anything in the last battle it’s that personality is way more important in a singing competition. Or not. Winner: Nicole. Brandon obviously deserved a steal, so of course he wasn’t.
Montage! And I’m all out of ways to say that these people are unimportant.
Devyn Delorea vs. MarissaAnn “Free Your Mind” by En Vogue
Christina returned to her tired and true coaching method of scream/singing at her team members. (Side Note: Chirstina has been clear that she is building a pop team this season, so why was Billie Joe Armstrong the logical choice? He looks like he wants to kill himself in every rehearsal package. End Side Note.) Thanks to Christina’s expert coaching the performance turned into a battle of who could be the loudest. It is clear that Christina is using this show as a guise to quietly build an army of her clones; young, aggressive, run loving, pop stars. For what purpose we do not know, but these two are the 4 star generals. Confession: I still don’t know which one is which, but lady Devyn’s have to stick together (even if they make dumb vowel choices). Winner: Devyn.
But, just as Carson predicted, there was a steal! How does he do it!? Christina’s army will continue to fight, now with a fun southern accent! MarissaAnn is Team Blake.
– Devin Mainville