AHS: The Coat Hanger

ahs2Asylum started this week’s episode with another trip to the present, only this time we weren’t catching up with our favorite horror freak (or were we?). No, instead we met Johnny Morgan, a man so tortured by his impulses that he consulted the Penny Saver for the cheapest hypnotist money could buy (more likely, the one with the fuzziest looking skin, but more on that in a moment). The budget friendly doc, used to smokers and over-eaters, was ill-equipped when Johnny started divulging his past of skinning cats escalating to human women. But Johnny didn’t want these urges; he wanted an explanation as to what had made his this way. Thanks to a handy Google search he found his answer; he’s the son of Bloody Face (who he also named as Thredson, so clearly our dear doc is going to be caught. Hopefully soon).

After concrete evidence that Thredson does indeed have a spawn to keep his legacy alive, we’re taken back to 1964 and the (maybe) mother of said spawn. At this point Lana was unaware of her family way (because she doesn’t know that in TV world any time a woman pukes it means she’s pregnant), but Sister Mary Possessed happily relayed the happy news. Lana was a little less pleased. For some reason being pregnant with a sociopathic killer’s baby, conceived through rape, didn’t fill her with maternal joy, it left her jumping at the first out she could find. That out happened to be a coat hanger. Alone in her cell she made the choice Briarcliff had tried to deny her.

Or did she?

ahs3Lana hopped back on the We-Need-To-Kill-Bloody-Face Train, but Kit was harder to convince since Thredson is key to clearing his name. So they struck a compromise. Lana went to Thredson and informed him he was going to be a daddy. His joyful reaction would have been sweet if he was anyone other than a sociopathic, homicidal, rapist maniac, but he is so Lana cut the celebration short by whipping out her abortion hanger. She told him she was planning on getting rid of the kid and he begged and pleaded with her to keep it. He promised her he could change and she demanded he prove it by provided incriminating details about his Bloody Face exploits. He really thought he was convincing her… until he heard his own voice repeating his confessions; Kit had been recording the whole thing. Oh and by the way, Lana maliciously added, she had already performed her hanger assisted procedure and gave him all the gory details before threatening to kill him as well. Couples, they just become more alike the longer they’re together.

But if Lana wanted to make good on that threat she should have acted then. Her attempt to steal a knife from the kitchen was thwarted so she was forced to make a shiv out of her trusty hanger, but when she returned to her captive he was gone. She searched the eerie hallways (a little less thoroughly than my nerves could handle), but the only person she found was Sister Mary. Instinctually she knew the nun was responsible for freeing Thredson, but Sister had a bigger bombshell to drop; the abortion hadn’t took. Lana was still carrying and also it’s a boy.

Now, I know all signs are pointing to Lana carrying the future scruffily sexy Bloody Face Jr., but that is precisely why I don’t think it’s true. AHS isn’t exactly known for predictable storytelling; the only thing we can be certain of is that nothing is certain. So yes, at the moment it would seem that Lana is responsible for Baby Bloody Face (and the fact that Sister Mary Possessed seems so thrilled is the only viable argument for its validity, because isn’t a little serial killing baby just the sort of thing the Devil would enjoy?), but she isn’t the only expectant mother at Briarcliff.

ahs1After his own close encounter Dr. Arden has come to the conclusion that perhaps Kit’s abduction story isn’t so farfetched. He’s also put the facts together and realized that all of Kit’s lady loves have been taken by little gray men shortly after sleeping with Kit. And like any good researcher, he knows a morally ambiguous experiment when he sees one. And he is not one to be outdone when it comes to questionable experiments. Clearly, the aliens are interested in Kit, so if he were to be in danger they would have to step in to protect their test subject. In short; Dr. Arden wanted to “almost kill” Kit in order to bring aliens into a mental institution. It’s just what the place needs.

The craziest part is that the harebrained scheme goes according to the plan. Dr. Arden stabs Kit in the heart, Kit seizes and then goes still and right on cue the shaky white light is back. Dr. Arden followed the light and it led him to a cell currently inhabited by an alive and pregnant Grace being tended to by Pepper, who suddenly seems like the sanest person we’ve seen all hour. What could it all mean? We’ll have to wait until next year to find out.

With all these new souls about to be born into Briarcliff, the time has come for a revolution and it looks like the former warden will be leading it. When Sister Jude awoke she was restrained in bed and informed she wasn’t Sister Jude anymore. She was Judy Martin, another naughty patient at Briarcliff. Her self-defense against Leigh had been re-written by the axis of evil into the second attack of a woman gone mad; Frank’s murder was also her crime to atone. Leigh gave moving testimony that not only incriminated Judy, but also cast himself as a repentant sinner. The act convinced the inquisitors as well as Monsignor Howard.

The ambitious Father, who has all but disappeared behind all the craziness this season, remerged to remind us just how ambitious he is. It turns out he sees Briarcliff as the first step towards a Papal career. And the next step will be converting a mass murder. Enter Leigh. He kept up the pious act long enough to have his shackles removed and to get the Monsignor into the largest baptizing pool I’ve ever seen inside a mental ward’s chapel (not that I’ve seen a lot). After the baptism was complete and Leigh was reborn a new man, he went straight back to being the same man he always was and downed the priest.

With evil securing its hold over the hospital Judy now sees the sins for what they are and promised Lana she would make it right, she would atone for the sins she had committed against and fellow woman and free her. Will she make good on her promise? Overriding the power over Briarcliff is going to be a lot more difficult than breaking a record, but if anyone can do it, my money is on little Judy Martin.

– Devin Mainville


One comment

  1. Pingback: American Horror Story: Asylum, S2:E9, “The Coat Hanger” « I'm Self-indulgent on the Internet

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